I’ve been “MIA” since finding out my oldest son was accepted into the RMC last week and has to leave in a couple weeks already! Needless to say this Mama has been a MESS! I knew I would take it hard BUT I didn’t realize it would knock me down. I’ve been battling my depression since finding out which I had under control for years, thankfully I have an amazing support team around me who help keep things in check BUT I’m not gonna lie, there are moments I just cry and let it all go and don’t want anyone around. I am SUPER happy for my son as it’s been a DREAM of his and only a select few get into this program, it’s an amazing experience and I am very proud of him for never giving up, he is going to make our Country proud!, but it’s just SO hard to “let go” – how on earth do parents EVER “let go” of their kids! I’ve been a stay at home mom up until the last couple years and haven’t been away from him for more than 10 days, thinking about being away for MONTHS is not making it easy. It’s funny, I now see what that homeless lady in the Vegas ER meant when she looked at me and said “take it one day at a time” while we were on vacation a few months back – I believe now even more than before that she was a Guardian Angel sent to give me those words to help me through this, as those words have helped me to regroup and get through the tough moments. My boys are my everything, and having to finally “let go” is one of the hardest things this Mom has had to do (Thankfully my youngest is still at home for now J ).
I’ve realized again that my “emotional eating” is NOT cured – and I’ve realized also that I doubt it ever fully will be. This week has been a challenge and I finally said “forget it”, I am honoring these feelings, I’m eating the bread, the brownie, the pie and everything else as I don’t care! I had about 4-6 days of this and decided this morning that enough is enough. I started tracking my food again this AM and am starting fresh. I had my few days to just “let go” and I NEED to get back on track as eating this way has just made me feel worse from all the sugar and junk. It helped for about an hour but you always feel WAY worse after. I need to look at the bright side and see that many Moms have had to bury their children, and all I am doing is saying “see you soon” for a little bit, I can still have contact with him and I need to embrace this positive side. Some days are easier than others, but we can either let the negative fester and bring us down or we can FIGHT with all we have and turn it around. We are ALWAYS going to have things creep up in life that can trigger our emotions, and we need to stop allowing it to be an excuse to fall down.
The members of our locations WW’ page have been an amazing support as well in uplifting you when you need it, I am so thankful I joined this amazing group as it’s so true when they say you are more likely to succeed if you have a good support system.
While I did “fall off the wagon”, I did also get back up and I think it’s so important to not “beat yourself up” as we ALL will have these falls. It’s how you handle the fall and what you do after that determines your success. It’s SUPER important to honor your feelings and “let it out” when you need to, just don’t let them take over. At first I tried to hold all the emotion in, but it only makes it worse. Feel what you feel, let it rise and release and embrace what it’s teaching you. I also found an amazing natural supplement via the Health Clinic I work at which takes the “edge” off the sadness (and boy can you tell when I don’t take it) to help me manage this “change” a little easier, as I believe at some points in our lives during our journey we need to seek help and or medication to help us along. I’ve also been in the middle of researching Therapy as I KNOW I am going to need this to help once my son does leave. It’s not a sign of weakness reaching for help but rather a sign of strength – NEVER forget that when you hit a point in life where you feel you are struggling it’s empowering to reach out for help – it took me YEARS see this truth.
In the end this trial will only make me stronger and my son and I will BOTH grow from it.
I’ve realized again that my “emotional eating” is NOT cured – and I’ve realized also that I doubt it ever fully will be. This week has been a challenge and I finally said “forget it”, I am honoring these feelings, I’m eating the bread, the brownie, the pie and everything else as I don’t care! I had about 4-6 days of this and decided this morning that enough is enough. I started tracking my food again this AM and am starting fresh. I had my few days to just “let go” and I NEED to get back on track as eating this way has just made me feel worse from all the sugar and junk. It helped for about an hour but you always feel WAY worse after. I need to look at the bright side and see that many Moms have had to bury their children, and all I am doing is saying “see you soon” for a little bit, I can still have contact with him and I need to embrace this positive side. Some days are easier than others, but we can either let the negative fester and bring us down or we can FIGHT with all we have and turn it around. We are ALWAYS going to have things creep up in life that can trigger our emotions, and we need to stop allowing it to be an excuse to fall down.
The members of our locations WW’ page have been an amazing support as well in uplifting you when you need it, I am so thankful I joined this amazing group as it’s so true when they say you are more likely to succeed if you have a good support system.
While I did “fall off the wagon”, I did also get back up and I think it’s so important to not “beat yourself up” as we ALL will have these falls. It’s how you handle the fall and what you do after that determines your success. It’s SUPER important to honor your feelings and “let it out” when you need to, just don’t let them take over. At first I tried to hold all the emotion in, but it only makes it worse. Feel what you feel, let it rise and release and embrace what it’s teaching you. I also found an amazing natural supplement via the Health Clinic I work at which takes the “edge” off the sadness (and boy can you tell when I don’t take it) to help me manage this “change” a little easier, as I believe at some points in our lives during our journey we need to seek help and or medication to help us along. I’ve also been in the middle of researching Therapy as I KNOW I am going to need this to help once my son does leave. It’s not a sign of weakness reaching for help but rather a sign of strength – NEVER forget that when you hit a point in life where you feel you are struggling it’s empowering to reach out for help – it took me YEARS see this truth.
In the end this trial will only make me stronger and my son and I will BOTH grow from it.